Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Reflect

I've been reflecting alot lately. About the good things and about the bad things.

I spend alot of time by myself. So I'm left with the company of my own thoughts! Normally I would say that this is not a good thing, however as of late I've quite enjoyed it!

This time last year I was enjoying a day at the lake with my friends, and a night at the Calgary Tower for my best friends birthday with one of the coolest guys I know.

In that year, my best friend has moved-we're still bff, but we just went from seeing each other everyday to a couple time every few weeks. That coolest guy ever is married. Where am I? I am laid up on a couch with a big blue brace on.

I guess part of this post comes out of frusteration, not depression...cause I am very happy...just frusterated. Can someone have a happy frusteration. I don't even know if frusteration is the right word.

Yesterday, I went to see Eat,Pray,Love. Liked it, Didn't love it. I fell asleep thru it actually. It kind of reminds me of my life. Recap of the movie for those of you who haven't seen it-- A womam is married, she realizes she doesn't want to be married, she doesn't feel fuilfilled. So she leaves her husband, takes a year off travels to three different places, she eats, she prays(meditates) and she finds love. Now clearly I am not THAT dramatic but I feel like I want a divorce from Calgary. I want to get away, I want to eat, pray and love. Once I take care of a few loose ends in Calgary, and I get the rest of my instructing certifcations I want to travel to a few different places over the course of a year. Then I'll come back and I'll figure the rest of my life out! Now I was planning this(a few blog posts back) in about a year, but due to my current situation I'm going to keep this plan in the back of my mind...not forgetting about it, and saving it for when the Lord wants me to go(I'm not going to make the same mistake twice) I'm going to do this in his time not mine.

It takes alot for me to be able to say Not my will, but Thy will.

I can finally say it :)

Okay, so this didn't turn out as emo as I thought it would. ha ha. It didn't really go in the direction I wanted it too either. Point is. I've been reflecting. I've been making plans. I've been positive. I'm going to take as much out of this as I can.

xoxo

<3

2 comments:

Teri said...

one of my favorite quotes is faith in god means faith in his timing.
:o) It's good to ponder and reflect!

Lachele said...

I have a hardtime leaving things in other peoples hands especially when it's regarding me!!

I'm slowly letting it be His will and not my will!